Neverending White Lights
by Banks123
Summary: When Gail stumbles across a murder, she is shook to her very core. Determined to do everything in her power to catch the killer, she will fight to the very end for everything she holds dear to her. Set 1 year later, this is a Gail and Holly love story with a murder mystery twist. Rated M for sexual content in numerous chapters.
1. Running up that hill

The snow crunched under my feet as I ran along the quiet darkened path. The January frost stinging my lungs with each breath. It was six in the morning and I'd made my escape from the depths of warm cradling arms to the empty sleep-driven streets, mind pacing with every stride as the shapes of the Toronto skyline fought to reveal themselves in the moonlit hour. I'd barely slept, yet my mind was still in overdrive as I recounted the previous days events for the millionth time, struggling to keep my emotions under wraps. Yesterday, I had come face to face with death, albeit not my own, but the woman I cradled. In reality, she was just a girl of 18, an entire 10 years younger than myself but with more wisdom in her final moments than I had been able to grasp my entire lifetime.

Last night I crept into our room, Holly, long asleep, snuggled under the white cotton sheets and I let go of the breath I hadn't known I was holding. Undressed from my ruffled uniform that now lay on the floor, I slipped in next to her, immediately feeling her warmth on my cold aching limbs, my name mumbled under her husky unconscious breath, somehow aware of my presence. "_Shhhhh, sleep Hol"_ I'd whispered into the quiet, my eyes slowly adjusting to the dimly lit room to take in her serene sleeping face that twitched slightly at my voice. I moved to her, stroking her hair gently away and kissing her bare shoulder taking in her familiar comforting smell as she wriggled her way into me without waking.  
I watched her sleep then. A mouth twitching, eyebrows wriggling, arms pulling, soundless dream-full sleep, unable to fall asleep myself.  
I did that sometimes.  
Watch her.  
Unable to comprehend how I'd managed to get lucky enough to have her there, next to me. She was magnificent and alluring and elegant and divine and I was not.  
And she was beautiful.  
Not just because of her looks but because of her thoughts and the way her eyes sparkled when she spoke about the things she loved and because she cared about people, like really cared and she made people laugh even when she was sad herself and because she saw it all, all of my cracks and crevices and still, for some unknown reason, she still reached out to me at night in her sleep when I stumbled in after a days work or a trip to the Penny and she still wanted to kiss me in the morning when I grumbled incessantly and she still smiled at my touch and smirked at my sarcasm, when I could barely look at myself.

I can't recall when it had began exactly,_ this affection_, but it had slowly smouldered away until it had engulfed me in an interrogation room and now she was all I could taste in my mouth at night and she was all I could think about each day from the moment I woke and she was all I could feel from the tips of my fingers to the ends of my toes.  
And I wanted it.  
I wanted it all.  
I _had_ wanted it all for the past year, each and every comforting moment, sweet touch and tender caress.  
But how was I supposed to tell her when I couldn't bare to tell myself.  
I didn't want her to see this, to see me and my weaknesses and I wanted to be brave for her_.  
For me_.  
I knew I was letting her down in my own insufficient way but I was struggling and that wasn't something I was able to readily admit to. I was a god damn fucking Peck. A lean, mean, crime fighting machine. I rarely showed emotion and quite frankly I just didn't express myself without a sarcastic remark or a look of content.  
And yet, in reality that wasn't me at all.  
It was a mask that I faked and held onto in the morning but which slowly slipped away from me during the day.  
In reality, I was a crumbling mess.  
It was the reality that I couldn't face.  
What lay behind my eyes at night and had the ability to torture me during the day.  
And in reality I couldn't let her see that.  
I knew she would care, I knew she would panic and worry and fret and agonize and I wouldn't,_ I couldn't_, allow that.  
Not about this.  
Not about the part of me that made me scream silently and the part that made me want to tear my eyes out and scrub my skin and yank at the aching flesh around my wrists and ankles, shaking uncontrollably at the sight of a needle.  
Not the part of me that blamed myself for Jerry and not the part of me that saw the brief flicker of raw pain in Tracy's eyes every time she looked at me.  
I didn't know if it was pain or guilt that overwhelmed me and rendered me incapable but it was Holly that I craved for and it was Holly that made me feel again and it was Holly that I didn't want to disappoint or let down. _Not again._

It was lighter now and I knew that I must have been running for a while without allowing my mind to calculate the strain in my legs and the beat of my heart. The hustle and bustle coming to life before me. I knew that by now she would be awake, making her coffee, pondering my whereabouts and I felt guilty. Guilty for leaving her there in our bed without a word but a single kiss. It reminded me of the early days. The days when my Peck pride had gotten the better of me. She had fought for me back then and I don't think I could be more grateful for that. I wondered sometimes what had made her do it, fight for me, and I realized I liked that she had made me feel like I was worth fighting for. I liked that she was stubborn and refused to accept my shit when everybody else did because with her I was able to be the truest form of myself and that's what she took from me. I had been treated for so long as if I was invincible and yet there she was, with eyes full of hope and life changing promises that literally made my heart skip a beat. She saw me at a point when I felt my tender grip on life slipping, she was there when I needed her to be even when I fought against it. But I'm not sure I could put her through that again. Yesterday, I had walked blindly into something that would change everything. The glint in his eye as he stood proudly in front of the woman he'd callously strapped down to a table. It wasn't the fact that I'd walked so blindly into this scene that had shocked me to my very core but the fact that such a sight could bring out such a response in me. A whimpering, shaking, harrowed shell of a person. The memories flooding back, overwhelming me, bringing me straight back to Perricks disturbing clutches.

Climbing the steps to our apartment, I checked to see if her car was gone before cautiously proceeding forward. _Yes_ I was avoiding her, but I just needed to process this anxiety, this fear, the fear of seeing her face when I told her I was failing. If she caught me now she'd probably slap me silly, scorning me, and the thought of that sends a unnerving jolt through my limbs. My body aches for the comfort of our bed and the quiet darkness of our room. She was at work and I suspect that in some way or another she'd be concerned about me believing that I too was hard at work, and that hurt a bit, the bitter guilty tentacles wrapping tightly around my already throbbing heart.

I showered, letting the warm water wash over me bringing me back from the numbness that had assaulted my body and let myself drop onto the soft mattress that awaited me. It was cold now, the warmth of sleeping Holly long gone. I missed that. I missed her arms that wrapped around me and legs that scrambled over my own and her breath that tickled at my neck and her lips that grazed against my skin as her hair floated delicately over my chest. I missed her pulling at my arms and tugging at my tee and I missed that cute mumbling thing she occasionally did in her sleep but always denied. It had been a long time since I'd been in bed alone and it suddenly felt enormous despite the fact that most nights I complained that it was too small. It wasn't the bed as such, it was Holly's insistence that she slept on top of me each night leaving a foot of space on her side as I balanced tediously on the edge of mine. Pulling the covers high over my head, I pushed out the world, finding peace in the small igloo I'd created myself, a parachute of duvet saving me from falling deeper into nothingness.

I was wavering on the brink of sleep when I heard it. The clutter of keys and the scurrying of feet. The frantic call of my name. And I knew that she knew. I gulped despite the dryness of my mouth and squeezed my eyes shut. The bedroom door flung open with a knock and I could hear her anxiousness fall to relief at the sight of my body bundled tightly in a ball under the sheets.  
"Gail..."  
She says again soothingly before I feel the dip in our bed and the pull of the covers. The outline of her body pressing gently up against my back. I shudder involuntarily as I breath her in, the mixture of her perfume and shampoo wafting over me, appeasing me as I force back the tears that threaten to fall. We are silent for a while and I can hear her thinking as she rubs the tips of her fingers along the pale skin of my stomach  
"I went to the station..."  
she finally whispers into me and places a light kiss to the back of my neck.  
"I was worried..."  
She says her tone rising, scolding me slightly  
"I missed you"  
she whispers again and I nod turning in her arms so that our foreheads touched, her thumb wiping at the fresh tear on my cheek. The silence hits us again as I struggle to look at her directly in the eye. Instead, I watch as the fair hairs on my arm jolt awake as her fingers brush repetitively over them like electric.  
"We tell each other stuff right?"  
I wrinkle my nose at her choice of words and find the corners of my mouth twitching at the reference. I look to her then, to her soul searching eyes and wondrous lips and kiss her  
"I saw Ollie"  
she says breaking away from me. _Yes_ she definitely knows.  
"He asked me how you were"  
I nodded, my lip trembling slightly as I scrunch my eyes and lean against her.  
"Baby..."  
She takes ahold of my face and brushes away my hair before placing random kisses across my cheek and eyelids and nose before allowing herself to finally settle back on my lips. I look at her again and frown as I squeeze her into me.  
"I don't want you to worry about me ..."  
I finally muster  
"I...I...I don't want to scare you..."  
"Scare...?"  
She repeats. I nod  
"I don't want you to see me like this...this weak"  
I flinch at my own words and watch her eyebrows nit together as she registers them, processing and turning them over in her head.  
"Gail...you may look in the mirror each day and see flaws and weakness but when I look at you, all I see is this amazingly strong woman...beautiful and generous and funny and kind and loyal and..."  
I feel my cheeks burning suddenly, a smile enveloping my face, and she watches me happily as she rambles  
"A bloody pain in the ass mind you..."  
She continues and I choke out a laugh  
"Completely sarcastic, has a bizarre habit of wearing nothing but socks in bed"  
She scrunches her nose  
"Forces me to buy endless supplies of doughnuts and tequila and constantly has this disgustingly cheesy puff breath"  
I roll my eyes  
"But hot as hell..."  
I clamp my hand over her mouth as she attempts to bite me  
"Hol...don't you ever just shut up"  
I kiss her forcefully then, my hands pulling her further towards me, grasping at the skin that seeped out at her waist and allow my tongue to run along her outline of her lower lip.

When we part and our breathing has returned, somewhat, to normal. She restarts  
"I know you're trying to protect me...but you need to let me protect you as well sometimes...when your ready..."  
"I know"  
I reply simply, kissing the underside of her chin.  
"Besides, it's my job..."  
I smirk  
"Your job? I'm sorry...I thought you were a Forensic Pathologist?"  
She laughs  
"My job as you're girlfriend silly"  
She responds poking me in the ribs  
"Girlfriend?"  
I feign confusion  
"Ha yeah...what else would you call me?"  
"Ummm I don't know ...A booty call? A Friend with benefits? Lunchbox? Nerd?"  
I tickle her, moving my fingers to a different spot with each suggestion as she giggles into me  
"Well...if that's the case I'll be going then"  
She mocks, loosening her grip and shifting from under me but I pull her back tightly, crashing my lips to hers, my body trembling at the sound of her moan.  
"Hol?"  
I breathlessly whisper to her  
"I love you"

**a/n Thank you to everyone who has taken the time to read this. All feedback (good and bad) is welcome. Bring on season 5**


	2. Walk down memory lane

"Hey...what you doing here?" I call out quizzically, holding out my hands as I see Holly standing around helplessly in the busy station corridor.

She visibly inhales and smiles awkwardly as she sees me fast approaching and I raise my eyebrows, urging her to answer me

"Would you believe me if I told you the courier was sick?" She grins sheepishly as I reach her and my hand brushes away the errant strands of hair that frame her face

"Ummm no?" I laugh "Hol, you know you can't come down to the station and use that excuse _every_ time you decide you want to kiss me during working hours" I nudge her jovially, scanning over her before letting my eyes wander over to the door of the empty interrogation room.

"I'll have you know Officer Peck, I actually came down here for a meeting" She responds feigning innocence, her eyes crinkling at the sides. God she was cute. And I liked her hair like that. All cascading and wavy and touchable and grip-able and just...

"Oh yeah?...is that what you're calling it nowadays" I mock, rolling my eyes and grappling for her wrist. I look around us to ensure nobody is watching before I pull her towards the steel door of the room eagerly. Hey, who am I to turn down a walk down memory lane?! Today had been a series of immensely mundane tasks due to Frank putting me on friggin desk duty for my first shift back since my tiny meltdown last week. I'm ecstatic for the distraction if nothing else and she more than willingly lets me lead her in to the darkened room. Quickly, I push her roughly up against the pyrex glass, leaning in to kiss the soft flesh of her exposed neck as she gasps. After a year of dating, I can honestly say I will never get used to this feeling of having her in my arms, of the butterfly's that fill my stomach at the touch of her skin.

"Gail..." She giggles as I run my hand up the inside of her blouse, weakly pushing against me, before resting her arms casually on my shoulders with a shudder of breath. I can hear the buzz of the outside world milling around us, yet right now in this moment, I'm lost in this small heaven we've created, between the crook of her neck and the wisps of her hair and smell of her smooth olive skin

"HmmMmm" I murmur, my hand reaching further upwards allowing my thumb to sweep under the wire of her bra. I can feel the hitch of her breath, her pulse thumping wildly against my tongue.

"Officer Peck!" She moans and I feel myself grinning triumphantly. I love it when she says it like that, all gaspy and husky and god damn sensual. "You know..." She husks, running her fingers slowly down the notches of my spine, sending a jolt through my body "I did actually come here..." I lick her spot that I've grown to appreciate makes her squirm, and she bites down on her lower lip "For a...for a meeting" she huffs

"You did?" My head shoots up from her neck confused and she groans at the sudden loss of contact "Why didn't you say so?" I inquire frowning. She smirks at me knowingly, squinting her eyes

"I did! ...you just...you just..." My hands were wandering again and her head is rolling back and I can see her cleavage pounding on full display calling out to me and I'm trying to resist just pulling her top off altogether as she lets out a throaty whimper

"Just what?" I push, pulling her towards me so that our hips meet, I kiss her lips heartily as she tugs at my belt and I drag my nails along the long expanse of her back

"You're just distra...fucking...God...Gail" I see her slowly gulp, her eyes stuttering close and I can feel her fingers fiddling with the fastening of my pants

"Hol.." I choke, a chortle escaping my lips "we can't...not here...I'm on shift" I stammer regretfully grabbing her hands before she goes too far. She groans and drops her hands trembling "besides you, my dear" I jest "apparently have a meeting" she pouts at me and I laugh mischievously

"You're a tease Gail Peck...you know that right?" She grumbles, my smirk growing as I cock my head to the side and wriggle my eyebrows suggestively.

"So what's this meeting your just _soooo_ eager to attend then?" I ask as I readjust my starched shirt that suddenly feels incredibly crumpled and push it back somewhat neatly into my waistband.

"Well..." She glances at me, avoiding my watchful eyes "...Its with Frank" She fidgets awkwardly on the spot "I, errmmm, Ive been asked to work on your case"

"Oh" I whisper, the sound escaping with a sharp inhale of breath. I can feel her pitying eyes on me as I stare down at the stained carpeted floor just wishing the ground would swallow me up. The moment of blissful elation quickly vanishing.

"Gail..." She moves towards me and I see her feet before I feel her hands on my cheeks and her lips briefly gliding over my forehead "I can say no...if you'd prefer..."

"You know..." I find myself saying feebly "that girl... she asked me to talk to her..." She nods, watching me intently, urging me to continue as she caresses my cheek gently with the base of her thumb "you know, tell her a story, while we waited for the ambulance" my brows knit together tightly as my throat tightens "I couldn't think of anything" I sigh "my mind was literally blank and I could see her lying there in front of me and..."

"Gail...it's okay, I'm sure she..."

I ignore her, continuing

"Absolutely nothing...I was paralysed, I just kept imagining that it was me there..."

I feel the tears gliding down my face before I realize I'm crying "but then...I..." I chance a glance at her and she's tenderly surveying me through glossy eyes

"I told her about you..." My hands have found the skin of her hips again and I slowly knead it with the tips of my fingers "I told her I wanted to make you proud of me" I whisper

"I am proud baby..." She whispers back into my hair, matching my tone, before planting a kiss along my hairline. "I couldn't be more proud"

"Yeah?" I ask hopefully scanning her facial features intently

"Of course" she gently smiles and leans forward to kiss my lips

"Even though I have cheesy puff breath?" I murmur and she smirks into my mouth

"Even then..." She pulls me impossibly closer

"Even when I moan?" She pulls back and quirks her eyebrow

"Especially when you moan..." She says before planting small kisses along the length of my neck. I giggle

"Oi lady! Get your mind out the gutter" I poke her in the ribs

"Heyyyy...who was it who dragged me in here again?!"

"I thought you wanted to make out" I grumble, disappointed that wasn't her intention afterall.

"Exactly my point there missy!" God, why does she always have to be right. I lean my forehead against hers, soaking up the moment for as long as I can, breathing her in.

"I want you to do it Hol..." I venture "we owe it to her" I feel her head nodding against me and I close my eyes before leaning forward to taste her sweet salty lips.

She was right, that girl, I needed to be strong. For her. For me. For Holly.


	3. Just a couple of fruit loops

"Gail! your being..."

"_WHAT_..._WHAT_ AM I BEING HOLLY?" I shout a little louder than intended at this god forsaken hour

"Unreasonable!" She lets out with a sigh as I grumble into my fruit loops. Unreasonable?! I'll give her unreasonable. Not only do I have to come off my night shift to be met with Holly leaving for work, which of course means I have to go to bed by myself, which in turn means I won't be able to sleep. But I'm also greeted with THIS. I haven't even had my morning kiss. I long for my morning kiss. It's what gets me through the rest of the day and settles my rancid thoughts. Sometimes at night, when I lie next to her, long after she's fallen asleep, I can't help but wish it was morning already. I'm often mesmerized by her lips. The way they move and spout rambling sentences. The way they touch mine casting a spell over me so that I literally just cave into anything she says or wants. But no, not this time, I will not surrender.

"Me? I'm the one being unreasonable?" I look at her indignant

"_Gail_!..." She's interrupted by a knock on the door and I turn back to stare into my cereal bowl, taking a mouth full of the sugary goodness. Holly hates my choice of cereal, she always complains that I'm steadily reducing my life expectancy by the amount of crap I eat. Personally, I'd rather have another doughnut than eat the crap she eats...I mean who the hell eats so many greens willingly?!

I can hear her talking to someone at the door, but I can't quite figure it out, their words muffled and incoherent until she walks back into the kitchen, Tracy trailing somewhat awkwardly behind her

"...Maybe you can talk some sense into her..." She's saying

"Ha!...don't bet on it!" I interrupt and she looks at me open mouthed for a second before frowning, lines creasing her forehead

"I give up...I just...I give up" she exclaims throwing her hands in the air like she's attempting to swat flies "Look...I need to go..." she walks over to kiss me, but I move my head casually to the side, the kiss aimed for my lips, landing on my cheek. It's as much of a punishment for me as it is her and I regret it as soon as I see her reel back in shock from the rejection. "Well...I better be off...I..." Her eyes are darting quickly over my face before she comes back to her senses "Tracy, lovely seeing you again" She moves to hug her "Sorry, I have to leave like this, but I'm running late..." She says apologetically before grabbing her bag and leaving, the front door banging behind her.

I let out a sigh and I hunch over, placing my head in my hands before letting out a moan.

"Wowa...what did I just walk into?" I force my head up eyeing Tracy suspiciously as if I've just noticed she's there. It's become a tradition for Tracy to come over when Steve is working opposite shifts to us, we usually scoff our way through stacks of pancakes and syrup, much to Holly's disgust.

"The case" I shrug as if that explained everything. She nods and sits on the stool next to me, placing a gentle hand on my back briefly. So far, nothing on the body had been found to evidence his involvement in the crime and John Robbins I'd discovered was claiming his innocence. Despite me finding him hovering menacingly over the girl as she fought for her life, despite the fact that he'd been arrested literally red handed. I knew in my gut that he was guilty. I knew from the moment I'd seen those eyes and that smirk that he was evil. I knew that it wasn't an expression of innocence.

"I know he's guilty Trace, I just know it" I mumble. I knew this case had brought back the same nightmares in her as it had in me.

"Yeah I know"

We're silent for a while whilst we contemplate the news. I know it's not Holly's fault but I just want her to keep checking the body for any sign of evidence however small it may be.

"How's she coping this time?" I roll my eyes in response. She, meaning Holly, is freaking out. She has this habit that is rooted right back to the beginning of our relationship where she would over analyse and panic about my well-being, where all her knowledge about the role of a police officer would for all intents and purposes vanish. Her insistence that I request to stay on desk duty for a while is driving me to despair.

"She's doing that _thing_ again..." I sigh. Tracy laughs silently, her shoulders giving her away as they bounce uncontrollably

"That girl will get you in trouble one of these days"

"I _KNOW_! That's what I've been telling her...I mean how am I supposed to explain why I keep being late? It's getting embarrassing!"

"You could just tell Frank the truth...I'm sure he'll understand considering the circumstances"

"What?! That my girlfriend has decided that she will do anything in her power to prevent me from getting to work" I scoff "Do you want me to tell you what she did the other day?!"

Taking another mouthful of cereal, I watch as Tracy raises her eyebrows at me, before shaking her head "Errm...no Peck I don't think I do" she smirks before she eyes up the kitchen "hey, so what happened to the pancakes today?"

"She's banned them...she says I have an" I raise my hands signalling an air quote with my fingers "unhealthy addiction"

I scrunch my nose before shovelling another spoonful into my awaiting mouth as Tracy looks me intently through narrowed eyes

"So she bans pancakes...but allows you to eat those" she points towards my full mouth and I attempt a rueful smile

"I brought them on my way home" I say gleefully "she only mentioned pancakes and doughnuts...she said nothing about anything else"

"Doughnuts as well?! Well well...we'll see how long that lasts!" She chuckles "Right hand them over Peck, I'm starving" I contemplate saying no for a second before reluctantly handing over the box

"You do know your whipped don't you?" She asks after she's helped herself to a second bowl despite my death stares

"Yeah" I say glumly "I know...but hey look at her, who wouldn't be?!"


	4. Torture A dish best served slow

I had finally lost myself to the dreamy haze of sleep, finding comfort in Holly's claimed side of our bed. Her smell still lingering across the pillow allowing vivid images of her to cross my thoughts. It was a welcome relief in the snugness of the room, a rare moment I desperately clung on to for fear of entering a more sinister realm. My nightmares had well and surely returned recently leaving me frail and frightened. I'd been waking up a shivering, quaking mess, the sweat poring off me as I relived my worst nightmares night after night. Despite my reluctance, it was in those moments I understood Holly's apparent irrational fears of my work, her desire to wrap me up in cotton wool so that these nightmares don't become a reality once again.

The overwhelming feel of familiar soft lips to the back of my ear brought a jolt to my limbs and I sunk lower into the bed, the pillow smothering a moan. My lucid dream blurring with reality as her caress sweeps over my body and her breath lingers warmly over the nape of my neck soothing me further into this blissful lull. My body unwittingly relaxing as I feel her arms around me, reaching hungrily under my vest to seek the skin there causing me to hum pleasantly and grip tightly at the sheets. I fight against wakefulness, enjoying this moment, squeezing my eyes tightly shut despite the incessant calling of my name pulling me to consciousness. I was unsure how my senses had allowed me feel her against me so real and alive but I wasn't going to argue, I wanted more, I pushed for more and sought the comfort of her. It continued to amaze me that I had come to this, someone who craved for the comfort of another in the bright lights of day and the dark depths of night. And yet it was never quite enough, I ached for her constantly, the touch of her skin, the caress of her lips, her smell, her taste, her alluring sounds awakening my senses and sweeping through me like wildfire.

I don't know how long I'd been asleep but to my surprise my body suddenly felt more rested than it had in weeks.

"Baby..." her whisper felt clearly against my ear and I frown deeper, my eyelids tightening. I smile at the sound of her chuckle, sighing contentedly.

"You need to wake up..." She murmurs causing me to groan incomprehensibly. I know I'm steadily waking up to reality, the brightness of the room forcing its way into my eyesight without my permission, however my body is still hallucinating, her touch against me like a living dream.

"Mmm" I whimper, pulling the sheets tightly against me in an effort to stay in this blissful state but the hand trailing up towards my chest and the gentle tug on my earlobe is driving me to distraction, my body automatically flexing. My eyelids reluctantly fluttering. And once again I'm lost, my mind momentarily unable to comprehend the sight before me as I feel her lips on mine, pulling at my lower lip.

"_Hol...?" _I croak, my confusion clearly evident on my face. I grip at the collar of her shirt, pleased at the view it was affording me in our current position before my mind wanders back to our earlier argument

"You know I'm still mad at you Hol" I grumble, my hands betraying me as they seek the flesh between her shirt and trousers. My heart filling at the sullen expression overtaking her face

"I know..." She breathes, barely audible despite the quietness of the room. And I give in to the urge to stroke her face, watching intently as she licks her lips and leans into my touch, closing her eyes.

"I can't keep being late Hol, people will think I've lost my nerve" I warn

She nods into my hand, silently acknowledging my claim despite herself and I turn my body into her, letting my fingers drift up her side, taking in the smoothness of her skin and reach for her mouth.

"Tomorrow..." I look into her eyes as our noses touch "my alarm will go off..." And watch as the flush fills her cheeks, her eyes immediately diverting from mine timidly

_"It was an accident"_ she mumbles and I nod, fighting the urge to laugh. I knew she was lying about the alarm, that in her haste she'd switched the time, but I couldn't stay mad at her and her adorableness, when she gave me those eyes. When deep down I knew what it really meant. It had become her habit of the last week, that had resulted in me being late no less than three times. A distraction technique that had ranged from the allusive resetting of the alarm clock to the temptation of sex

"...and I will kiss you..." I continue "...and I will get up and go to work, just like normal and..." I kiss her forehead, allowing my lips to linger "I will come home to you" I could feel her heart pounding against me as she nervously fiddled with the hem of my vest. "_Now_" I say, moving her chin so that I could look her in the eye "are you going to tell me why you are home from work already..." I move my hands further up her body "or am I going to have to torture it out of you?" I move my hand under the confines of her bra, taking her breast into the palm of my hand, running my thumb over her nipple as she lets out a long, deep audible breath.

"Torture..." She giggles as she recovers somewhat from my touch "_definitely_ torture" her body squirming under me at the thought. I laugh with a shake of my head. _God! This woman!_

I allow my hand to wander slowly back to the front of her blouse, releasing the buttons at a snail like pace as I kiss, lick and suck at each new revealing space, until finally her top is completely open to me. I pull at it eagerly, wanting it off, flinging it carelessly across the room and pull her closer to me, pulling at her legs that naturally wrap me without pause or hesitation, straddling me

"You know..." I murmur into her neck as my fingers dance along the curve of her spine, my mind providing the map of every millimetre of her body that I have memorized and indented firmly in my brain and yet can never tire of. "I think..." I nibble at her neck and lick at her pulse, sucking it into my mouth "I'm going..." My fingers deftly undo the clasp of her bra "to have to..." I move to her lips taking them in, all plump and inviting, allowing my tongue to seek the corners of her mouth "teach you..." My hands pull her bra down her arms and I throw it over her shoulder "that you should never..." I undo her belt and pull down the zip of her pants "agree to torture" I leave a trail of kisses down her collarbone, moving to focus my attention on her breast, spiralling my tongue in circles that slowly get smaller and which eventually, after a few drawn-out agonizing minutes, wrap around her hardened nipple. I can hear her panting, gripping at my vest and I take her hands, pushing them behind her back as I graze my teeth over her nipple and then continue to tease her with my tongue, before moving to her other breast, repeating the process. Her body shivers as she attempts to release her hands but I tighten my vice-like grip, a grin forming on my lips as I slide one hand into her pants.

"Mm Hol you're so wet" I murmur into her, teasing her as her body arches, a low growl emitting from her mouth. I quickly pull my hand out and smirk at her bewilderment. Pushing her back so that she is now beneath me again, I pull off her pants, leaving her in just her underwear and she takes this moment to rake her fingernails up my back, a move I'm certain will leave its mark. Gently stroking at the cloth between her legs I kiss directly down her stomach before landing at the top of her thighs, spreading her legs further apart with my body. Her hands finding my hair as my fingers trace patterns around her thighs, deliberately hovering over, but not quite touching, her centre as she pushes her hips into me aching for more. She moans sharply, gritting her teeth as my fingers hook around the edges of her underwear, pulling them slowly down as I continue to suck her thigh and then blow cold air onto the wet part, watching intently as the goosebumps rise on her skin.

"_Ga...ail" _she stammers, her body trembling beneath me. And I breathe in the beauty of it all. The arch of her back, the insistent tug of my hair, the moan of my name. I had grown to understand her body, I knew every dip and curve, I had plotted endless expeditions across the expanse of her wondrous belly, the mounds of her breasts and the entire length of her legs and yet, I was lost within her. I ached to trace every line and kiss every freckle and devour every inch of her skin. I look up to her, seeking her eyes, glossy with desire, my whole world within them and I brush my fingers lightly over her core, watching as her eyes roll, her head tilting away from me with inaudible sounds. I knew I was pushing her near to agony, I could see her pulse pumping erratically and her body straining with each touch as I prolonged her torture, her incomprehensible mumblings and tightening grip on my scalp, spurning me on further.

"What is it Hol?" I breath into her, my lips moving back up her body as she groans. My thigh slipping between her legs, pressing lightly against her. I can't help my smirk. "Hmm?" I tease, watching as her eyes beg for me. I can feel her moving against me as she tries to release some on the tension that has built between her legs and I hold her hips down as my tongue arduously travels up her trachea, over her chin and finally to her swollen lips bringing her into a delirious state.

Her hands have moved to my ass now, desperately pulling me to her, but I resist, eager to hear her outright beg. "You still want torture hmm?" Her skin is flushed and sensitive to the touch and I know that she is swimming in the feelings, lost in a wave of emotion

"_Please_...Gail" She urges, begging and I finally move my fingers into her. Her mouth parting without sound, her muscles trembling. Slowly I move in and out of her as I begin my descent back down her rocking body, pausing momentarily over her nipple and then her belly button. Finally I allow my tongue to glide over her, taking in her sensitive nub and rolling it with the tip of my tongue. I can feel her legs starting to spasm around me, her fingers taking a white knuckle grip into the sheets. "_Fuck_..." She cries and I push faster momentarily, tasting her, acknowledging she is on the brink, before slowing her down again despite her protests. I move back up to her mouth, kissing her, biting at her lips as she whimpers. Enjoying every moment, I move back between her legs drawing my tongue along the length of her before my fingers enter her again, my name fast becoming a blurring chant in the air as her body tenses around me. Her toes curling, her breath catching, her blood pumping as her entire body loses control. It's a glorious sound as she gives in to the orgasm rippling through her body and I tenderly kiss her flushed skin. Her body spasming at each tiny caress.

We lie there for a while, side by side, the silence of the room hidden under the sounds of our heaving breaths as we slowly recover.

"I couldn't let you go without your morning kiss" she finally lets out

"Hmm?" I question confused, my head turning towards her

"Why I'm home early" she husks "I couldn't let you go without your morning kiss" _God I love this woman._ Leaning in, I kiss her tenderly, stroking my thumb across her cheek that is still hot and clammy.

"I _love_ my morning kiss" I murmur into her mouth. Grinning as she moans

"What time are you working tomorrow?" I pull back at her question, narrowing my eyes suspiciously

"_Hol_..."

"I know I know" she grumbles "But...Can you not ask Frank if you can go on desk duty again?"

I groan. "Holly!...I can't keep having this conversation with you..."

"_Please_.." She begs, her eyes searching mine "for me..."

"Ugh Hol...not fair..."

"Ill do anything... _Please_" My ears prick, eyebrows raising

"_Anything_?" her head nodding now enthusiastically

"Anything!" I watch her intently. Cursing myself for what I am about to do. I know what I want, I've been fantasizing about it ever since I first stepped foot in her morgue but I pretend to deliberate as she wrestles her lower lip between her teeth.

"Lab coat!" I finally declare "You. Me. Here. _AFTER_ work. Lab Coat"

"Gail...I can't just..." I silence her with my finger to her lips, my eyes looking at her sternly

"Lab coat"

She laughs

"Okay...you asked for it"


	5. Kick started with a jolt

Admittedly they were not as bad as they once were. Not since I had met her. She had been the welcome distraction that I had unknowingly desperately yearned for. Their occurrences had diminished to almost nothing once I had met her and her beautiful smile, gentle touch and geeky ways. My heart was so occupied by her that I no longer had to feel the constant pain or have the constant visions or have the constant reminder of why Jerry was dead running through my mind. She had pulled me free and I felt safer, from the moment she had walked into my life through those woods swinging her lunchbox, she had pulled me into a new line of thought and out of the deep dark hole I'd been trapped and festering away in.

That was why my reaction that day was such a shock, not only to me but also to everyone around me. I'd felt the ground shift, a crack suddenly seeping through and the flashbacks unwittingly returned dragging me down a notch or two.

It had been over 2 years since Perrick had irreversibly changed my life. Being trapped in that dark, damp riddled basement with no way out, his smell, his touch, his voice had stuck so unpleasantly to my every thought that I knew that if I ever somehow made it out alive that I would never be the same again.

But I had made it out and now I was here, standing in this white tiled foggy bathroom, my hair wet and matted, a fluffy white towel wrapped luxuriously around me concealing my modesty, and her, sleeping soundly in our bed, naked and deliciously ruffled.

Wiping at the mirror, steamed from the shower, I stare at my reflection. I was still Gail Peck. The Gail Peck who hailed from a policing dynasty, the Gail Peck who did nothing to exonerate her bitchy exterior. Yet so much had changed. I was not the same woman I was back then. Sometimes I curse him from taking that from me, but then, she floats into my mind and I'm happy for the Gail Peck I've become.

I had told her everything. From the undercover assignment at the hotel bar to the moment I was found in the trunk of his car bound and gagged. I had watched as her face went through so many emotions, from love to disgust to anger. I had told her about the nightmares and flashbacks and she had soothed my soul with her comforting hands and warm heart. And I suddenly felt like it was easier to breathe, like a weight had been lifted and slowly I was becoming the woman I always knew I could be and that was because of her.

It was only in rare moments that I had a nightmare and I hadn't had a flashback for almost a year, not until 3 weeks ago. The overwhelming surge of fear rushing through me like a freight train, knocking me sideways. Since then, my mind had drifted endlessly from the dingy basement to the safety of her arms. Both images clutched at my heart but for completely different reasons and whilst I desperately clung to the image of her, recent events pushed my thoughts to the other.

I tiptoe out of the bathroom, across the wooden floorboards, carefully avoiding the one that creaks with any form of pressure, and into our bedroom that is slowly allowing the morning light to shimmy through. Reaching my drawers to pull out my underwear, I pause to look over the photo frames that occupy the surface top. The photo of me, Chris and Dov at the Penny. The photo of Traci and Steve with Leo at the Zoo. The many photos of me and Holly, kissing, laughing, smiling. I pick up the one of us on the steps to our home, Holly's arms draped across my shoulders as I sit tucked between her legs, both of us grinning at the camera, endless amounts of boxes surrounding us. It was from the day we had moved in, the first time in my life where I felt I could actually call somewhere home, and the first time in my life that I had felt so much love I had thought my heart may explode. I let my fingers run over the glass, my heart thumping wildly at the memory and can't help but let go of a tear filled smile.

Turning around to the bed, I allow my eyes to reap in the sight before me, from head to toe and my heart gives another leap. She looks so peaceful and unassuming. Her hair strewn wildly, my lips slightly parted, her arm thrown casually across the bed across the spot where I would usually be, the bed covers riding so low down her back that I can see the curve of her buttocks. My mouth involuntarily watering as my gaze lingers, silently taking her in. Deciding to leave her to her blissful slumber slightly longer whilst I make her coffee.

* * *

I'm dressed, work bag packed, shirt pressed, ready. My hand gently placing the steaming coffee on the nightstand before I sit on the edge of the bed, my hand reaching across her body to the mattress as I bend down to plant small kisses along her spine resulting in the most delightful sounds as she awakens. I watch with a smirk as finally she eyes me from the corner of her sleep lidded eye, a groan escaping her mouth before she flings a pillow over her head in an attempt to resume sleep.

"Morning grouchy" I laugh into her. She wasn't exactly a morning person I had learnt. She always insisted it was because I kept her up half the night but in reality she just hated leaving the warmth of the comfy bed, her early mornings thus consisted largely of rushed beginnings and her one saving grace; coffee. She mumbles something into her pillow and then squirms as I tease my fingers down her back. A satisfied moan rising into the air, her body pushing towards me "You're too late lazy bones" I say standing up "I gotta get to work" and her grumbles return causing me to laugh again, I'm perhaps enjoying this morning role reversal a little too much. "Hol, if you want your kiss this morning, you're gonna have to take your head out from under that pillow" and just like that, she's out, her body has gloriously turned and she's pulled me into a searing kiss that takes the smirk right off my face.

* * *

"Peck! My office now!" That was Staff Sergeant Frank Best. His voice disturbing my x-rated daydream with a jolt and I quickly rise from my seat wiping at the drool that has escaped my mouth and smooth down my uniform. Noticing Dovs gaze, I swiftly smack him over the back of the head with the palm of my hand on my way past

"Ow, what the hell was that for?"

"Your existence!" I scowl over my shoulder

"I'm telling Holly you're being mean again!" If looks could kill, he'd be dead by now.

* * *

"Gail, sit down...I need to discuss something with you that's come to my attention"

I gaze across the room to the empty chair in front of his immaculate desk. I liked Frank. He had kind eyes but he could also do his job with a leadership I admired.

"I want you to know you've done nothing wrong..." He starts as I sit down and my brows knit together "Gail, another body has been found. Been there a few days from the looks of things...the body is still been looked at" I'm not sure if its the spinning of the room or the feeling I've just been kicked in the stomach, but I feel like I'm going to be sick, the taste of bile erupting into my mouth.

"Tha...that's not possible is it?! He's in custody is he not?" I stutter, puzzled.

"Yes Gail. Let's just say, we've found ourselves a bit of a problem." I sink further into my seat, the feeling of dread rattling through my bones.

* * *

I've been staring into space for God knows how long, my mind lost to the constant clatter and rush of officers until Traci was stood before me, blocking the sunlight that was streaming through the window from my face. Plain clothed, sympathetic smile and I'm brought back to the hospital and that day. I still remember that day when Traci came to visit me after Perrick. I'd struggled to even look at her, the overwhelming burden of blame weighing heavily on my shoulders. She made me look at her now like she did that day and I let out a sigh

"Are you gonna talk to Hol?"

Her question surprises me. I don't know why but I just can't envisage discussing with Holly whether or not she thinks I should work the case, I already know it would be a resounding no.

"She doesn't need to know...not yet" I watch as she opens her mouth to say something but stops herself, pausing, before she just nods "I mean, I need to do this right?!"

Her forehead crinkles and her expression is momentarily pensive

"Gail, I can't give you that answer. You need to think about this long and hard before you agree to anything because once you say yes there may be no going back"

She's right of course. The case has already had such an impact on my state of being that I've actually volunteered for counselling of all things. But how could I refuse. I owed it to that girl and I owed to myself to find the people responsible.

* * *

So much had happened in the space of 24 hours that my mind and body were struggling to keep up. I struggle as I drag my legs up the remaining steps to my front door, intent on grabbing a beer and throwing myself down in front of the tv for the night. As I open the door, I first notice Holly's boots on the floor. They are her work boots, slightly muddied from being out in the field. I'm slightly anxious to see her as I linger at the doorway and I desperately try to put a more livelier expression on my face than the worn out, guilt riddled one that currently resides it.

"Why hello there officer" her words catch me off guard and my head shoots up from its current position, my eyes widening as I take her in.

Never in my life has anyone been able to render me a gawping, speechless imbecile. And yet, here I am. My bag drops from my shoulder with a thump and I stand firmly planted to the spot. Never in my life has anyone been able to completely stop me in my tracks, completely blurring my mind. And yet, here I am. My eyes taking in the lace underwear and the white lab coat that did nothing to contain her modesty. Never in my life has anyone been able to make my heart beat this fast, make me dribble as my jaw hits the floor or distract my mind so that I can't even recall my previous thoughts. And yet, she does. She's leaning casually against the wall down the corridor, a mischievous grin adorning her face, her hair cascading down

"Fuck...me" I stutter finally, my body already a quivering mess

"Don't worry" she purrs "I intend to"

* * *

**a/n I forgot to add: thank you to everyone who has took the time to read this fiction. A special thanks to those who have commented (particularly annabanana, entermariska and auggy1984). I understand this story so far may be slightly confusing...but it's only the beginning so please bare with me...I hope to do it justice.**

**A quick note to 'your girl' - do you still want me to answer that you complete loser!? ;) x**


	6. Labcoats and Phone Calls

AN: Apologies for the HUGE delay on posting this story. I have been somewhat distracted of late BUT you have one pushy lady and a 7 day ban to thank for this, so I hope you enjoy...here goes...labcoat I hear you say...

* * *

I remember our first time. Holly had been gentle and loving and had taken it slow, for both our benefits. She had lay me down and removed each piece of clothing with a slight hesitation in her trembling fingers, watching me with an intensity that burned right through me, out of control and unstoppable. Now, however, there was no hesitation or nervousness as she slammed me up against the hardness of the wooden front door. Her hands instantly pulling at my fur collared jacket, closing any space between us, her mouth feverishly finding my own.

"Mm you're late Peck." she murmurs against my lips and I chuckle as I run my hands around the bare flesh of her waist, just above the hem of her black panties.

"How long have you been waiting like this?" I ask, my eyes wandering over her, taking in the purposely provocative wearing of her horn rimmed glasses, the white collared lab coat complete with a toy stethoscope balanced upon her slender neck and the complete lack of anything else other than her black lace underwear.

"Um, an hour maybe..." she admits, a slight rasp entering her voice.

"You are so fucking sexy, you know that right?" I smirk, the image of Holly waiting in her come hither pose for an hour almost too much for my brain to comprehend. Leaning forward slightly, I pull Holly further to me, softly kissing her lips, savouring the moment. My lips slowly finding her's soft, supple ruby mouth and delicately inviting her in.

It was Holly who began my disrobing, pulling off my jacket and letting it fall without care to the floor. I let my fingers run up her back, under the lab coat as her hands fumble with the buttons of my work shirt until it finally falls open and she let out a contented sigh. Her fingers dancing along the curve of my breasts that had been completely covered prior to this point, across the v neck of my dark navy tank top, taking their sweet time between my cleavage as my chest rapidly rises and falls under her spell.

"So doctor..." I groan as she starts to fiddle with the buckle of my belt ." What's the verdict? Can you suggest my remedy?" My hands squeeze her ass as she pushes herself incredibly close to me. I can feel her heart beating against my own, the hotness of her breath, the push of her flexed thigh between my legs, altogether drawing a slight whimper from my lips. The heat between my legs building ridiculously quickly as we engage in a make-out worthy of horny teenagers.

"Hmmm" she teases, her lips running smoothly along the base of my neck, sucking at my pulse before placing her hand firmly against my left breast. "Your heartbeat is awfully fast..." she says, the palm of her hand rubbing against my hardened nipple. "Perhaps some time in bed may be called for...and…" she slides her hand down the length of my body, before placing it directly between my legs, causing me to utter a few inconsequential expressions. "You do seem very hot...Shivering...Slightly incoherent...perhaps you have a fever?" She smirks at me as I gulp loudly, her eyes watching my face tauntingly "I dooo believe we should remove your clothes Miss Peck to..."

I immediately move to drop my pants, my shirt and tank top coming off in record timing like superwoman on a mission in front of an astonished looking Holly, her mouth still gawping open from her unfinished sentence.

"Doctors orders and all that." I answer casually to her unspoken question with a shrug, causing her to giggle lightheartedly.

"Well...we wouldn't want to go against orders would we?!" Her hands roll over my body and her lips find mine again seductively as her fingers pull at my thigh to rest over the curve of her hip bone, before exquisitely grinding herself into me.

"You kn...know..." I struggle to find the word, my mind fogging over with the friction caused by each press of her body against mine "We'll never...make it...to the b..b..bedroom…."

* * *

I'd slept soundly until the incessant ringing of my cellphone brought me regretfully out of a peaceful slumber that had been filled with nothing but joyous memories of our previous love-making, a rabbit hole that I'd more than willingly jumped down without hesitation or regret.

"Come on...lights out...cuddle up...hands in place...eyes shut...sleep well my beautiful girl..."

Holly's final chanting words of the night had soothed my soul and kept me safe and secure in the darkness of sleep. It had become our nightly ritual as she smoothed her fingers delicately over my temples and urged me to shut out the demons that she knew often lurked behind my closed eyes. A ritual urging me to tuck myself up into the crook of her neck, into the security I found wrapped tightly in her arms as I drifted, into the protectiveness of her hands as they wandered wanderously across the soft skin of my back as I slept. She knew of the nightmares that I suffered from way before i'd even met her. Nightmares that clenched at my soul and left me reeling and scared and she knew her nightly chant helped me settle. If only for a few hours of peaceful sleep.

Last night was unforgettably amazing and my dreaming mind was ablaze with so many sexual fantasies that I'd woken with a smirk already plastered to my lips. The sexual activities and consequential chant had erased possibilities of any night terrors and had instead left me sodden and in a state of reverie. The vivid image of Holly between my legs frying my already sizzling mind as I lie back and recount last nights action with a step by step precision, my mind blocking out the monotone ringing of the phone that i'd deliriously left to dial out. The way she had put into action my role play fantasy with an enthusiasm worthy of an Oscar, using her glasses that she knew I found irresistible to her full seductress advantage. Her fitted labcoat working wonders on her svelte frame against the undergarments that purposely left little to the imagination. She'd teased me with her stethoscope, an earlier purchase she'd made from a toy store to build up the doctor persona she had now encaptured, listening to the erratic drumming of my heart as she'd swept through me and used her very own bubbling champagne medicine to suck and lick arduously from across the flatness of my stomach. My mind recounted the way she had teased and provoked every fiber of my being, her hands tracing every curve of my body as her tongue deftly worked me into such a frenzy that I had been begging for release. For her fingers. The calling of her name expertly drawn from my lips. She'd licked and tugged and bit and sucked until I couldn't take any more. She'd played with my body until it was screaming in ecstasy with a multitude of sins.

Holly, on the other hand, had woken from her much deserved sleep, albeit briefly, with a grumble about the phone. And I slowly become aware that it was still ringing in the background as I watch her push her head under the soft feather pillow, groaning my name with added profanities before she fell back to sleep.

"Peck." I answer on what must have been the hundredth ring. "Diaz...fuck sake...do you know what time it is?" I glance at the clock situated on the bedside cabinet and I'm amazed as the digital time glows half nine "Yes, I'm still sleeping you moron..." I listen idly as Diaz stutters and stumbles over his words in true Chris fashion, my focus momentarily distracted by a freckle on Holly's lower back that makes me question if I had ever kissed there before. "Cut to the chase Chris...I've got more important things to be doing than listen to you ramble."

"There's another body and..." the line crackles and distorts his sentence. Did he just say another body?! I frown into the phone, sitting up suddenly in the bed as Holly unfurls herself and rolls her warm lean figure completely away from me towards the other side of the bed.

"Chris?! ... What? You mean the one they found yesterday?"

"No Gail...another! Been dead a week or so...look I think you best get up...Sarg will probably want you down here." and with that he cuts off, leaving me flustered and confused. A wave of dread filling my stomach with such force I feel like I'm going to be sick. I glance fearfully over at Holly, who appears completely oblivious to my current frantic state and I jump off the bed, hastily making my way to the bathroom to avoid a commotion I'm unable to currently deal with if she wakes up. I realise the issue here. The fact that this case somewhat resembles my own traumatic experience that had left me at the mercy of a serial killer, but that is exactly what makes me want to overcome it. To fight. To bring the person responsible to justice. Make them suffer, the way they made these girls suffer. Made me suffer. Maybe I was wrong before, but I'll find them. I must.

I run a frustrated hand through my hair that's post-sex ruffled and knotted beyond belief and frown at my weary expression in the mirror. My post coital bliss having worn off rapidly since the call. I'm in desperate need of a shower I recognize. Turning on the hot water tap before stepping in, the feel of the water shocking my body awake as I allow the tears to slide down my face, masked by the steaming water falling from beyond my head and I recall the events that had left me a damaged individual.

From the moment I stepped into Andy's apartment and shrugged off my heels, my phone call to Nicks answer machine declaring my selfish need to see him, the sturdy knock on the door and the masked intruder that struck me across the face and grappled with me as I fought and screamed for freedom. The horror and fear I felt as Jerry was cruelly stabbed with the sharp end of a kitchen knife. The sound of which will stay with me forever, an overwhelming weight I struggle to bare on my raw and tender shoulders. Perrick had taken something from me that day; a more innocent sense of self preservation that had now taken on a more sinister form. A form of revenge for me and for Jerry and for all the girls that had been strapped to the table and made to feel the weakness that had crashed forcefully over me in my time of desperation.

When I had unassumingly walked straight into that scene, and I had seen Elizabeth, the victim in this scenario, strapped down like I had once been, it had all been so above and beyond what my already frail mind could decipher, that I knew I had to stop running. I had to fight for all of us, to face this head on. The vulnerability in her eyes had struck me that day. It had tore through me and ripped me ungraciously apart as I helplessly yearned for her life and as the water from the shower falls across the tensed muscles of my back, I recall the tears that were shed. Not only my own, but of all the girls that I had so far been unable to save.

'Today is going to be rough' I say silently to myself, building myself up to the major task in hand 'But you are a god damn fucking Peck, Gail' I nod to myself, clenching my fists tightly 'You're going to go out there and you ARE going to beat this... Beat him! Beat them all!'


	7. Wash all your troubles away

A/N A big thank you to all those who have read, favourited, followed and reviewed - each one brought a smile to my face. I am hugely grateful that you have all stuck with me despite my ridiculously long delays in uploading chapters! :)

And with that said...

To the utterly theomorphic, paradisiacal individual in my life, without whom, I'm not sure this chapter would have ever been written. You are a true inspiration and these written words certainly wouldn't be half as delightful without you, even if you do mock my love of showers and frustratingly ban the joys of baked goods! Thank you my darling for loving my weaknesses and my absurd obsession with knowing every word held in the English dictionary.

And to the chapter I go:

* * *

I must have been stood in the shower for a while, my mind lost in a sea of never-ending thoughts. My heart beating to the sound of the cascading water for so long that my fingers were wrinkling from their endured submersion in water. It wasn't until I felt the warmth of bare skin behind me, pressed against the curved spine of my back and the pull of her slender arms tangling loosely around my naked waist, that I was brought back to the reality of the steamed white tiled bathroom and surprisingly Holly's presence.

I hadn't been aware she'd even entered the room. My mind completely oblivious to how long I'd actually been in here and how she'd come to be beside me, but the feel of her tender lips on the rear of my tense shoulder was a welcome relief from my self-inflicted mental torture. Her fingers spanning out widely to clutch at my ribs, before running up the front of my body towards my breasts, which were still slightly tender from our love-making the night before. Even in times of despair, her fingers magically transformed me into a quivering wreck, earning a sharp inhale of breath, my head involuntarily leaning back into her as my hand reached out against the tiled wall in a bid to steady myself from collapsing completely.

"I am shocked Miss Peck." I hear her say. I let out a soft moan as her hand fully palms my breast, her fingers expertly teasing over my now pert nipple. "You appear to have made a miraculous recovery!" Her teeth nibble down on the skin of my neck, before her tongue languorously glides from shoulder to ear "Although...Perhaps we should continue with your course of treatment just in case..."

I laugh despite myself, her words sending a warm shiver down my spine and I feel her reach for the wash cloth before bending slightly around me to grasp the bottle of strawberry scented shower gel off the caddy. I can't help the overwhelming pleasure I feel as Holly generously runs the foaming wash cloth over my shoulders, kneading her fingers into me as she moves along my blades and down my back towards the curve of my buttocks. She's meticulous and agonizingly slow and I can feel her smiling to herself as my body wantonly responds to her every touch, pushing into her in my shameless desire to have her once again. I turn my head towards her lips, my tongue eagerly meeting hers, as her cloth cladded hand wanders across my stomach, swirling to create a rich soapy lather against my skin. As I turn, I can feel her press against me, pushing me against the coolness of the tiles and I gasp as the sudden sensation hits my bones. She continues her assault, her hands smoothing over my front, whilst her eyes dance wildly across my face, opening me up and touching me at the very base of my soul, divinely possessing me from within, with a God-like resemblance.

"We need to be quick baby." she murmurs into me despite her previous snail-like pace. "I'm on call." I close my eyes and bite at my lower lip, the tips of her fingers inching ever lower down my frame as my hips thrust forward into her with a building passion. My mind has completely hazed, the aching need between my legs somehow taking over me despite the fact that it had been satisfied mere hours earlier.

My legs brazenly part to accept her as her fingers tease at the inside of my leg, her mouth curving into a smug grin against the side of my neck as I whimper her name uncontrollably. We both know I won't take long, my body still exhausted from my prior intense rush, is on high alert, bringing an extra intensity with every simmering touch and a pressure of some magnitude to surge within me. It is with an overpowering sense of satisfaction, when her hand finally strokes through me, her finger slowly pressing into me as I groan my gratification. My body starts to shudder as she thrusts her finger back and forth, her thumb purposely brushing over my clit to add to the mind-numbing, body-tingling sensations coursing through my entire body.

"Fuck!" I cry as she adds another finger, the coldness of the wall and the friction of her breasts as they rub against my own as we move into each other, taking my body through an entire influx of elation.

"How does that feel?" She questions tantalizingly.

"Mmhmm" I huff, unable to find the words as I am pushed to my climax at great speed, the sound of her giggle echoing in the room. "Holll..llyyy!" her name splutters from my lips as my orgasm rips through me, a shudder running right through my bones, paralysing me in blissful release. Holly stays there, pressed against me unmoving, our breathing coming together in shortened breaths, until the feeling in my toes returns and my legs stiffen to carry my full weight.

"You are so beautiful when you cum." she whispers into my ear causing me to let out a shocked gasp.

"HOLLY!"

She chuckles as I shove her shoulder, an embarassed look of horror crossing my face. "What?! You do..." Holly smirks "...Come on...we better hurry up and get dressed".

* * *

By the time I'd dressed and brushed my teeth to their sparkly best, Holly was seated on the edge of our bed, fully dressed with her jacket on. Her demeanour completely altered from the one she had a mere ten minutes beforehand.

"Going somewhere?" I asked trying to appear unconcerned despite Holly's confused frown following me across the room as I moved to open the curtains.

"Yeah got called to scene." I'm stopped in my tracks, my mouth gaping open silently as a thousand words run through my head. I know she's referring to the murder scene ."Gail...?" I turn back towards her and realise she's holding my mobile between her hands on her lap. "Why didn't you tell me?"

I don't know why but before I knew it I'd uttered. "Tell you what?" with a casual shrug and a tone of innocence, despite knowing exactly what she was talking about. Admittedly it was a poor attempt to avoid the question altogether, but she had to agree, her labcoat shenanigans hadn't left much time for heartfelt conversations.

"Gail...!" She exasperates. Her shoulders slump forward and she sits staring at me, waiting for me to explain. I try to busy myself, unnecessarily opening and closing drawers to avoid her gaze. "Ugh. Fine!" She groans finally, agitated by my silence. "Sergeant Best called, he wants you on scene. He seems to think you agreed to partner with Tracy on the case. So either you call him to say there's been a mistake or you tell me what's going on!"

"I did agree." I mumble quietly, feeling like a naughty child being reprimanded. It's oddly rare for Holly to get annoyed with me despite my awkward personality.

"But...Gail..." The annoyance in her voice gives way to concern and I have to breathe in deeply to keep my tears at bay. I can't handle her sympathy right now.

"I know." I say stiffly. "But I had to right? ... For Elizabeth..." and I watch as Holly sighs, her shoulders slump, then she shrugs and sighs some more as she slowly comes to term with the decision I had made without her.

"Ok" she concedes. "Lets go catch a killer."

* * *

"Hey!" Chris calls over as both Holly and I arrive together, having both been called to the crime scene. "What took you so long? I called you ages ago..." he says, his eyes darting from me to Holly.

"Shut up Chris!" I snap uncomfortably. "Just tell me what you got for me" I glance at Holly who is looking decidedly non plussed by his question.

"I'll leave you guys to it." she says, leaning in briefly to kiss my cheek and brush her hand across my lower back. "Chris...there's a beer in our fridge with your name on it..." She starts walking away from us as I frown. I hate when she gives away my beer. "Don't be a stranger..." She calls over her shoulder, as Chris grins and nods, much to my disgust.

"So?" I growl, as Chris slowly draws his attention back to me.

"The vic is female, looks to be in late teens to early twenties, been placed here after death." he says looking over his notes.

"Is cause of death known?"

"Preliminary analyses suggest she was tortured." he takes a breath. "Then throat slashed from the looks of things..."

"We got any clue to her ID?" I frown, glancing over towards the body.

He nods regretfully, " She is the young woman who went missing from a party the other week...Tara Jenkins. You know, the one with the parents..."

"From the station?" I feel a stab clench at my chest.

"Yes…" He says his shoulders dropping. "Seems they were right..."

"You first here?"

"Yes."

"Took statements from the witness right?"

"I did."

"Anything useful?"

"Found by a passerby and her dog this morning around 7. She normally walks this route every morning. Hasn't seen anything suspicious recently, but didn't walk down here yesterday. Said she spotted the bag from the trail, thought someone had been dumping trash, so went to investigate." I nodded as Chris gave me a quick summary of his notes.

"Right. Thanks Diaz." I say, already starting to feel the knots in my stomach. " I better get down there."

"Gail...umm" I feel him touch my shoulder stopping me. "It's not an easy sight..." He warns with a grimace but I already knew that. I had watched Elizabeth die.

* * *

The scene was an organised chaos. Amongst the English oak tree woodland, the yellow police ribbon cordoned off a large muddied area that lay beyond the woodchipped trail. The body, of Tara Jenkins, was half covered by scattered leaves and dirt and yet carefully positioned in a fetus position. She was wrapped in a clear plastic sack in a weirdly immaculate form of presentation despite the decomposition. Her hair had been coiffed and her make up perfectly aligned on what appeared to be a serene face, covering the more sinister injuries her body had brutally endured.

I watched as other investigators milled around, each appearing to have their own course of work to attend to. Recording each and every inch of the crime scene in meticulous fashion and I found myself impressed by their ability to somehow preserve the scene despite the number of people trampling over it. I stood to the side of the tape on a slight rise of land that allowed me to have a greater view over the whole area. The chill in the area burning my lungs as my eyes darted around the arena with increased curiosity.

This was the second body found in as many days and the news had spread like wildfire amongst the local media and community. Tara had gone missing after a party 3 weeks before. Until now, there had been no trace of her apart from the rare sightings of her on fuzzy CCTV recordings as she had made her way home alone. She had dressed to party that night in her black skinny jeans, corsetted top, stiletto heels and slightly inebriated state. She had, for want of a better word, simply vanished, much to her parents despair. That is until now.

I watched, as numerous men and women took their evidence, photographs, samples, particles and then as I gazed over towards the body which had clearly been placed here after her untimely death, I spotted Holly. She was talking with a serious expression to an elder man i'd come to know was her superior. They were clearly in deep discussion and I studied their interaction as Holly pointed towards the upper torso, before crouching beside it to take a closer look with the tools from her magic lunchbox. It had long come to my attention how Holly's unassuming beauty made her stand out from the crowd and I watched with an odd sense of pride as she worked. Her dark hair pulled back into a loose bun, her green padded jacket somewhat masking her frame but still allowing her envious figure to shine. Her black patented wellies covering her jean fitted legs and the tiny touch of makeup she'd thrown on as we left the house together emphasising her facial features. Regardless of the scene, I couldn't help but wanderously relish in her. A warmth flowing through my body and clutching at my heart despite the below freezing temperatures.

"Step back please." I call as a lady ignorantly pushes into the police tape a few feet from where I stand to take a closer look.

"Is that a body?" She queries, completely ignoring my request.

"Ma'am... Please step back." I repeat but she continues to ignore me. "Move away from the tape!" I growl in exasperation. I'm not in the mood for nosy onlookers.

"Well there's no need to be so rude about it!" she ventures, her attention now completely on me.

"Look …" I breathe. "Unless you somehow got something useful to aid this investigation..." I can feel my body tensing, my fingers curling into balls in my hands as I frown with discontent.

"I'm a local resident! An organiser of the Neighbourhood Watch support group...I deserve to know what's going on here..." She bellows indignantly.

"I don't care if you're the Queen of England...this is a crime scene lady...and you need to step back." I shuffle on my feet, strengthening my stance and puffing out my chest, my hand unconsciously shifting to my holster belt.

"It is my right to be here!" She shouts trying to match my posture. "As much as it is yours!"

"I very much doubt that." I correct her, with a look of disdain as she looks at me incredulously. I can sense the looks from my fellow colleagues turn in our direction as our raised voices echo in the hollow of the woods.

"Yeah? Who says?" Her tone mocking me as my frustration with her builds.

"Me. That's who!"

"And you are?"

"The Officer in Charge! And I will..." I'm about to give her the pissed off Gail Peck treatment when I feel a hand touch along the base of my lower back.

"Everything okay here Detective?" A voice, I know to be Holly's, asks. I don't look at her, choosing to continue my glare at the woman before me. The woman's initial shocked expression at my status now replaced with a confused one as she watches Holly's obviously intimate hand movement with added interest. I roll my eyes before refocusing them on Holly, who is looking at me with an overwhelming look of concern.

"Yes Dr. Stewart. Thank you. I'm just telling this lady to move away from the crime scene." We both turn our attentions back to the lady who holds her hands up in surrender before stepping back towards the wood's trail.

"You okay baby?" Holly queries once the lady and everyone else is out of earshot, running her hand across my forehead to push loose strands of hair from my face before finally resting her palm on my cheek.

"Holly. We're at work." I shrug her off, uncomfortable with the fussy public display of affection that she's currently bestowing upon me.

"That didn't stop you the other day in the interrogation room." she chuckles, attempting to touch my waist as I move away from her.

"I'm supposed to be in charge here Hol. It's completely different!" My eyes dart around the scene again, taking in all the people who, in reality, had no interest in my love life with Holly and had in actual fact got back to work after the minor interruption. "People are depending on me to do this job right."

"Gail, I..."

"Look Holly." I interrupt. "I need to start working. Update Diaz on your findings today. He'll be down at the morgue. I will see you later." I start walking away, without a backwards glance or waiting for a response, towards the body.


End file.
